When Our Self Esteem Is In Trouble
Are you feeling weak? Vulnerable? Is your self-esteem in trouble?
Self-esteem is a fragile thing, especially when we don’t base it on what God’s Word says about us. In the past, I based my self-worth on what I did (or didn’t) accomplish or what others thought of me. My relentless need to be loved and accepted drove me to unhealthy relationships, which left emotional scars.
My regrets outweighed the good things I’d done – by a huge margin. By the time I was in my twenties, I was overwhelmed with doubt that I’d ever be free of my advancing self-hatred. I was sure that if I didn’t begin (once and for all) to trust God, the darkness, brought about by all the regrets in my life, would swallow me up.
I sought Christian counseling and spent lots of time praying and reading my Bible. I came across several verses which helped me. One of my favorites was Psalm 18:28 (ESV):
For it is you who light my lamp; the Lord my God lightens my darkness.” I clung to this verse because I desperately wanted God to “lighten my darkness.
It wasn’t the first time I’d read this verse, but this time, its message “took.”
Regularly meditating (pondering) on Scripture changed my thought life. It helped me see things differently:
- I was God’s child – loved and valued unconditionally.
- I knew God had forgiven me for my destructive choices and suicide attempts.
- I finally understood that my heavenly Father had a purpose for me. This understanding gave me a brighter outlook on my life and myself.
Ultimately, I realized I needed God to change my heart. I prayed for Him to help me desire Him and His love for me more than the love and approval of those around me. Eventually, I could even love and forgive those who had hurt me.
When I keep God’s Word at the center of my thinking, I’m healthier, happier and more focused. More like the person I pray to be. The person God created me to be.
What about you?
If regret is making your world a darker place, hiding God’s Word in your heart will invite Him to show up right in the middle of your circumstances, your relationships – even in your thought life – and break shame’s power over you.
As we prepare our hearts for Easter, will you ask God to reach into the areas of your life that desperately need it? Will you allow His presence to lighten your darkness, help you make better decisions … and reveal your true value in Christ?
What do you think?
I’d love to hear your thoughts about this post. (Your comment might also benefit others.)
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Self-esteem is a fragile thing, especially when we don’t base it on what God’s Word says about us.
Beautiful thoughts. Thank you sweet Sheryl.
I appreciate you, Marla!