An Often Overlooked Consequence of Unforgiveness
In the Bible, God tells us to forgive people who irritate us. In a former neighborhood, I lived near someone who had the reputation of belittling others. Although I tried to be a good neighbor and spend time with her, she seemed determined to live in her pain.
One sleepless night, I wrestled with the memory of an event that happened a number of years ago. I tossed and turned for hours thinking of it. Like a rerun of a bad movie, her critical words and selfish behavior echoed in my head.
Tears rolled down my cheeks. The familiar (and hated) flush of anger filled my soul. I knew I had to make a choice: obey God and forgive my neighbor, or obey Satan and give in to the destructive rage. I struggled between rehashing the hurtful encounters and recalling Bible verses about forgiveness. Thankfully, after an hour or so, God won.
I stayed awake a little longer, joyously thanking God for loving me enough to give me the grace (and the will) to obey His Word, and then slept like a person in a My Pillow commercial.
However, even in my relief, I knew it wouldn’t be long before I’d be fighting the same battle again, if not with her, then with someone else. Will I have the desire and strength to overcome the next time? Or will I allow my emotions and will to dictate otherwise?
When we’re tempted by corrupt emotions, we often forget about one of the worst consequences of giving into unforgiveness (or any sin, for that matter) – shame.
Even emotional sins like unforgiveness and bitterness destroy parts of our character. When we don’t forgive, we behave and speak in ways we’re not proud of. The shame that pours over us erodes away who we are and who we want to become. (I often wonder if perhaps this is why the neighbor I spoke about behaved the way she did. This thought makes me sad.)
How often have you embarrassed yourself – not to mention blown your witness (your reputation as a Christ-follower) with your unloving behavior?
Perhaps praying Psalm 25:2 (ESV) every morning (and as often as necessary) will help:
O my God, in you I trust; let me not be put to shame; let not my enemies exult over me.
Is your sin of unforgiveness worth the shame it brings?
We glorify God when we allow His Spirit to help us walk obediently before Him. In contrast, the devil loves to hold our sins over us and celebrate our path to destruction. He tries to convince us that we can’t triumph over unforgiveness. But Satan is a liar. God’s power eclipses Satan’s.
Every. Single. Time.
What about you?
I’d love to hear your thoughts about this post. (Others might also benefit from your comment.)
- Is your sin of unforgiveness (or any sin) worth the shame it brings?
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Thanks for the loving exhortation Sheryl. Forgiveness is always a good reminder.
Thank you, Barbara. Forgiveness is so important!
And thank you, once again, for sharing my devotion on your Facebook page. I appreciate you, Barbara!
I love this message. For many years I had the problem of unforgiveness to the point that it was weighing me down. I’ve learnt to forgive most of the time but Satan is waiting eagerly for me to fail. I’m certain that I could improve in this area which with the Lord’s help I will continue to forgive.
It’s not always easy but it helps making our load lighter.
Thank you for this reminder of something extremely important in my Christian walk.
Thank you very much, Sandra, for another wonderful – and real – comment!
I, too, struggle with unforgiveness. I will pause to say a prayer for you. And I ask that you PLEASE pray for me as well!
I’ll make it a point to keep you in my prayers and that you’ll be able to continue in your mission to spread positivity in a starving world.
THANK you SO much, Sandra.
Psalm 25:2 (ESV) says, “O my God, in you I trust; let me not be put to shame; let not my enemies exult over me.”
My site was down for SEVERAL hours. I am happy to say we’re back online!!
Sheryl, you always have a great word that speaks to my heart. I’ve been struggling with unforgiivenes towards someone that is part of family and i considered a friend. Their selfish behavior took over a special celebration. Now the memories of what was supposed to have been memorable and special, are tainted with this behavior and some of the uncomfortable moments were done towards me without coming to me or being talked over. To save the relationship, my husband and I had to agree on everything. During this time I was also hurt by my dear one, I’m praying for healing and for the Lord to help me forgive all. You have encouraged me to go and look up scriptures on forgiveness and redemption, I know that as I forgive and release; the Lord will redeem this special milestone in our marriage and I will look back and only see what the Lord has done.
I love you dear friend.
Hello, dear Lorena. I SO understand. I absolutely relate. And I am so very sorry for your pain.
Let’s pray for each other as we both seek to forgive as Christ has forgiven us in every relationship so that we can, as you beautifully said, “look back and only see what the Lord has done”!
I love you too, dear friend.
Lorena, sometimes it seems impossible to forgive someone who was definitely in the wrong.
One reason in favor of forgiveness may help you to find balance in your life. Don’t let that person bring you down so that the hurt lingers.
Prayers for the ability to forgive and make your burden lighter.
Thank you, Sandra, for encouraging Lorena ~ and me. 🙂
Love, love your comment “God’s power eclipses Satan” “Every, Single, Time”. I’m so glad that “He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world!” Thank God that our Lord forgives us every, single time when we confess our sin before him. It’s not always easy, but He never said it would be! I’ve had to deal with this a time or two, even forgiving others who are not very easy to contend with, but I’m humbled, as neither am I always easy to get along with either! Thanks Sheryl.️
I posted a response to your comment, Kim, but it appears to have disappeared. So let’s try this again …
Amen! Praise God for His mercy, which is new every morning. And praise God for His grace to forgive others. AND for those who forgive us even when we’re not easy to get along with.
Thank you again, Kim, for stopping by Today Can Be Different.